Tuesday, December 30, 2008

NAKAKASUKA!

First there was Lipgloss, TV5's el cheapo version of obviously, Gossip Girl.

And now comes Takipsilim, the Pinoy version of Twilight.

Ano ba?! Wala na ba kayong maisip na bago ABS-CBN? Kopyahan na lang ba ang labanan? Dahil ba DYOSKO ang nangyayari kay DYOSA?

Even Perez Hilton is upset.

Haaay, kelan kaya magiging matalino ang Pinoy TV no? Kaya ang bobobo ng kabataan nowadays eh, it's coz of ideas and shows like this!

Ka-cheapan to the pinaka-top level! Linamon nya ang Master Showman sa ka-cheapan!

Saturday, December 27, 2008

PAKI-STRETCH PA PLEASE

Ah...eh...sa tingin ba ng Garage Magazine eh hindi halata ang pagkaka-stretch nila sa mukha ni Geoff Eigenmann sa latest issue nila?

We all know that this guy has had problems with his weight, and is just resting on being good looking.

He's a bad host. Tunog special child pag nag hohost sa MYX. He's a bad actor. Walang sinabi sa mga magulang nya. And he's a bad endorser. Hanford? Really? Is he even HOT? Like underwear hot? NOT!

Naiirita na talaga ako sa magazine na 'to. Napaka-pretentious. Eh puro lifted lang naman sa ibang US mags ang content. The styling is all messed up, articles are irrelevant, and it's P200 bucks. I mean fine, it is way better than that pathetic excuse for a men's mag called Metro HIM, but will you just settle for being better when you can be the best? Hay, I'd read Men's Health anytime than these.

I mean look at that cover. Milestone ba ang styling na pinakita dito? Wow, leather jacket on a plain white shirt! How come I never thought of that?! Uuy, dogtag! Sige, gagamitin ko uli ung mga laos ko na na dogtag! Uy, half-tucked ung shirt! That's such an ultra new tip!

If you're really the ultimate style guide for guys, then why don't you stay away from the high end brands and teach men how to dress up well without spending a fortune? I mean Zara, Springfield and Paul Smith? Scour through SM, Surplus Shop, Landmark, and the tiangges for the really cool and cheap finds.

And take note. If the Conde Nast publication, Cargo, didn't make it, then what chance do you guys have? Let's face it. We live in a third world country. The people who can afford your magazine and the stuff you push, are rich enough to not even buy your magazine for tips. Chances are, they already got style. Or if not, they have their own personal stylist or shopper.

There's so little of men's stuff out there that you'll surely run out of stuff to print. And men hold on to a shirt like an old pair of boxers. They hardly change their wardrobe, much less add on to it. Men are just fine as it is. Fitness is something they can welcome in. New fashion, maybe in like 40 issues in.

Friday, December 12, 2008

WORST NOSE JOB EVER

Please tell me what is up with Lani Misalucha's nose?

I mean come on, does she really think her doctor did such a great job? Seamless ba ang pagkakagawa?Nakakatakot kaya sya ngayon. Was she going for the Jacko look? Maybe it's a thing in Vegas now. Para magmukha ka talagang attraction. Para after her concert, sa circus naman sya sasali.

Dapat dun nalang sya sa doctor ni Angel Locsin nagpagawa, although mukhang mahal ang pagkakagawa nung kay Angel kasi hardly noticeable. Baka naman sale ang nose job na nakuha ni Lani kaya sale din ang kinalabasan? At least it did take a lot of steam off Regine's supposed nose job. Si Lani na ngayon ang reyna ng retoke.

Kaya siguro nagparetoke din si Martin kasi kala nya siguro, dahil sa ilong sumikat si Lani sa Vegas.

There are lots of bad nose jobs in Manila, and some good ones. Bad ones include Lucky Manzano, Ivy Violan, Verni Varga, Pops Fernandez and Nancy Jane (aka Nancy Castiliogne). Good ones include Sharon Cuneta, Piolo Pascual, Pia Guanio, Angel Locsin and Phoemela Baranda.

Sunday, December 07, 2008

THE WORST DIRECTOR OF OUR TIME

Now where the fuck do I start with this sorry ass excuse for a director?
Ok, as far as I know, he got his name up there by directing Regine Velasquez's music videos for her album R2K. Dunno how he managed to get that deal, maybe he paid Regine?
All his videos are such an eyesore. Tangina, lahat na lang ng kulay ginamit. Wala ng ginawa kungdi mag pan ng camera, bawat linya cut-to-cut sa iba-ibang set-up. Kairita! As if nakaka-impress ang ginagawa nya.
I hate watching SOP because he directs it. I never watched ASAP before 'coz most of the best singers are in SOP, but I find myself watching ASAP instead of SOP because his camera work gives me such a fucking headache. Ang sakit sa mata punyeta. Parang laging may fiesta sa SOP. Confetti, check. Lahat ng kulay ng ilaw, check. Bubbles, check. Smoke machine, check. Strobe lights, check. Laser lights, check. Oh and yeah, he directs Celebrity Duets, and the now non-existent Pinoy Idol and Songbird. I'm sure he directs more GMA shows, and I'm staying away from them.And the nice thing about it is a lot of people feel the same way too. He's a huge joke in the directing industry. Try asking people like Quark Henares or some of the more sosyal directors, and I'm sure you'll get a mouthful.
Apparently, followers of famous pinoy blogger Rickey Yaneza hates him too. He has no taste whatsoever, and I don't even wanna know kung san sya nag-aral mag-direct. Kung san man yan, best to stay away from that place. Yun eh kung nag-aral nga sya mag-direct. That's why it's no wonder why he hardly does big stuff, like movies, documentaries and stage plays. Because he's nothing. Mabuburo na lang sya sa music videos, kasi yun lang ang kaya nya, and wala pang kwenta.
To the GMA7 execs. Do not underestimate your audience. May utak ang mga tao ngayon, masa man yan. Instead of making the masa more masa, why not treat them to something different? And introduce them to better things diba?
Axe Louie Ignacio, and replace him with someone younger, who has fresher ideas, and someone who doesn't do the same thing over and over and over again.